


none but the lonely heart

by hholocene



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, dany-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-24
Updated: 2019-05-24
Packaged: 2020-03-13 22:18:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18949762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hholocene/pseuds/hholocene
Summary: Dany's death from her perspective. Introspection.-----A weeping child. A screaming mother.It torments her for a moment.No. No. She cannot think about that.





	none but the lonely heart

**Author's Note:**

> *deep sigh* 
> 
> There have been about 500 different think pieces online about the handling of Dany's arc this season, many wonderful, interesting and thought provoking. So I will try not to repeat the obvious sentiments but what I will repeat is that: it is a disgrace that the show found the time to give us scene after scene of the various men in her life debating her mental state and yet, never afforded us time with the character herself. So I wrote this brief piece to just lend some colour to what could be going on in her mind. 
> 
> Also, I don't wish to mislead any Jon/Dany fans. This is canon compliant, so he's still killing her.

The steel is cold against her back. Hard and unyielding.

 

She shuts her eyes and savours the feeling.

 

 _How many Targaryens have sat before her?_ She thinks.

 

She did it. She restored what was theirs. She brought justice to her family.

 

_It feels good._

 

The power, the shadow of her family’s great history. Years of strife and anguish finally coming to fruition.

 

 _She has earned this,_ she tells herself.

 

Footsteps echo from afar and when she opens her eyes, she see him standing there. His handsome face barely masks his condemnation.

 

“Was it worth it?” he asks. His judgement is inescapable. “Thousands dead -- all for that damned throne.”

 

She rises, her face twisting in agony.

 

 _Does he not understand?_ She wonders.

 

“Do you think that is what all of this is about?”

 

“I don’t know what to think anymore, Dany.”

 

 _Please understand,_ she wants to beg.

 

“ _This_ whole battle was about so much more than just that throne. I have been fighting this war, my _whole_ life. _They took everything from me_. My family gone, before I was even born. A life spent in exile, no home to call refuge. Today was justice.”

 

“Justice?” Jon spits out. “There were children burning! Little children! Mothers, fathers, everyone.”

 

There’s a flash of pain in her heart.

 

A weeping child. A screaming mother.

 

It torments her for a moment.

 

 _No. No._ She cannot think about that.

 

“I did what I had to do,” she states resolutely.

 

“The city had surrendered. The bells were ringing. Why did you not stop?”

 

Dany shakes her head. There’s a touch of panic, but the defiance burns stronger.

 

“They couldn’t be trusted. Tyrion, Cersei...he could have plotted with her. She could have had soldiers in hiding. I couldn’t risk it.”

 

She takes a step closer, and another.

 

“Don’t you understand, Jon?” she urges. “I had to end this war, rid the world of a tyrant like Cersei Lannister. And it was at a great cost, but it is over now. We can build a better world and we can do it together.”

 

He is so close, and yet he lingers.

 

She wants this, so much. The two of them together, united against the world.

 

“If you want to build a better world, then pardon the Lannister soldiers. Let Tyrion live. Show them mercy.”

 

“I can’t,” she shakes her head yet again. “They can never love me, never see me as their Queen. They will fight my vision for a better future every step of the way.”

 

“How do you know that, Dany? How do you know what is right or wrong? Who deserves to live and to die? How can you know that?”

 

“Because I know what is good,” she tells him sincerely. “And so do you.”

 

She takes another step forward, her hand reaching for his face.

 

“We can build this new world together,” she almost pleads. “Do it with me.”

 

He reaches for her. Holds her cheek in his palm.

 

There are tears in his eyes.

 

“I’m so sorry,” he whispers.

 

It is too late by the time she sees it. The silver of his dagger and then, the searing, wretched pain.

 

“NO!” she yelps out loud.

 

 _Not you_ , she wants to scream. _Not her one to love._

 

His hot tears fall on her bleeding body but she can hardly feel it anymore.

 

She hates him. In that moment, she hates him so deeply.

 

The dizziness grows and then he is fading.

 

Faintly, she can make out a thunderous roar. An anguished wail.

 

 _Her baby boy_ . _He will protect her,_ she thinks.

 

She remembers the Red Waste. How her dragons had clung to her.

 

She had wanted to protect them. She had wanted to protect everyone.

 

Her senses grow duller and her mind drifts.

 

She sees blinding sun. 

 

Her dragons are in the sky.

 

Missandei and Jorah are watching her sons playfully fight.

 

She hears laughter. It sounds like a child’s voice.

 

In the distance, she spies a red door.


End file.
